UTVols News and Opinions

Welcome to the Friday edition of Coach Scooter’s College Football Diary. Let’s get to the games this weekend, as well as some observations from the week that was.

Thursday Night

#2 Auburn 24
S. Carolina 17

Oh goodie, the Gamecocks looked tough last night, so the Vols get to add them to the list of unfriendlies to be worried about, like Georgia, Alabama and L.S.U. What’s amazing is Auburn held the ball for all of the third quarter, while U.S.C. held it for most of the fourth, and if it were not for a dropped TD pass, the game could have gone into OT. The highlight of watching the game was when Sweetie walked into the room and asked, “Who is that guy on the left?” I replied “Chris Fowler. “Oh, he’s hot.” I got to thinking, “Well, it could have been worse. Lee Corso could have been announcing the game…”

Saturday games of interest:

#24 Georgia Tech - #11 Virginia Tech
3:30 ABC – Brad Nessler – Bob Griese – Paul McGuire

Last year the Hokies blew away the Jackets 51-7. However, VT has a freshman QB, two starters suspended, plus struggled against Cincinnati last week before finally taking control in the 4th quarter. Just so you know, it was the Cincinnati Bearcats, not Cincinnati Bengals. It’s make or break time for the Jackets. If they win, Chan Gailey will be safe for another year, and if that happens, I think this could be the win that propels them to the division championship. Ah, what the hell, I’m picking the Ramblin’ Wreck.

Alabama - #5 Florida
3:30 CBS – Verne Lundquist – Gary Danielson

If you think my column is wide of the mark this week, I blame Leigh Tiffin. Sorry, bad line. Anyway, the Tide is 7-1 at Gainesville and has the defense to stay with the Gators. Normally, I would be excited to sit in front of the TV with my Hooters wings (Hooters is the official wing supplier to Coach Scooter’s College Football Diary) and a big bottle of Harveys Bristol Cream while watching the S.E.C. headline matchup. However, when I saw Genius Danielson was the color analyst, I considered watching Boise State at Utah since it is pure hell to have to listen to that dunce. In fact, I did some checking and found out that having to listen to Danielson do the S.E.C. game of the week is punishment for shoplifting in some countries. Anyway, since the Gators are entering a four game stretch of hell (Bama, Auburn, L.S.U. and UGA in the next four games) I think they will lose one, maybe two. The skid starts now as Bama upsets Florida.

#10 Georgia - Ole Miss
9:00 – ESPN2 – Ron Franklin – Ed Cunningham

All right, let me get this straight. "The King" Ron Franklin, back from his stint as the play-by-play man for the Saperstein family backyard football game, is relegated to the ESPN2 late night S.E.C. game. Just who did he piss off to get this demotion? Don’t get me wrong, I love the fact he is doing an S.E.C. game, but this sort of thing has to stop. Pretty soon, they will be pairing him up with infomercial candidates like Pam Ward. Since I will be watching this game only to hear the King speak, as well as some possible shots of sorority girls tailgating in the Grove, I have to make a prediction. Dawgs cover the spread in easy win over the Rebs.

Stanford - U.C.L.A.
10:15 – FSN – Barry Tompkins – Petros Papadakis

The only reason I listed this game is for the announcers. Barry Tompkins, fresh from his stint on the set of the new movie, Cocoon: 3, Gridiron Glory, will be paired up with some dude named Petros Papadakis. Is he named for the place in Knoxville called Petros Chili and Chips? That name sounds like he is a Greek secret agent. “My name is Papadakis. Petros Papadakis. I’d like an Ouzo, shaken, not stirred…” Well, since I have to make a prediction for the game, I say Papadakis will steal Tompkins Geritol by the third quarter and walk away with the victory, as well as save the Rose Bowl from world domination.


#15 Tennessee – Memphis
12:00 – ESPN – Sean McDonough – Chris Spielman

The Vols travel to Memphis to take on the Tigers in what should be another fierce contest between two state schools. Memphis always plays the Vols tough, and Saturday should be no different. The key is the UT running game. Take away the 89 yard TD run by LaMarcus Coker and the Vols would have rushed for a net of 87 yards last week against Marshall. Just wait until UT plays Georgia, Alabama and L.S.U. where the yards can REALLY change! However, Memphis is giving up 185 yards a game on the ground, plus the fact Tommy West fired Joe Lee Dunn on Monday, so the Vols could be in for an easier time pounding the rock. Another key will be the fast start Memphis has gotten off to. In their first three games, the Tigers have outscored the opposition 53-28. But in the second half, they have been outscored 49-25 so that hints at a depth issue. As long as the Vols take control early, the depth should be the difference, but don’t be surprised if the game is close, like these games usually are. Coach Scooter picks the Vols, but close…

Garry Danielson mis-quote of the week: (If Ron Franklin is the king, then Gary Dainelson has to be the court jester)

It came in the second half of the Alabama-Arkansas game. When Arkansas performed the wrap around draw play, Genius Danielson uttered, “That’s called the ‘Enema draw.’” When a stunned Verne Lundquist stuttered, “The what,” Danielson replied, “The enema draw, since you come from behind.” I don't want to hear about that kind of stuff while watching football! It took me a quarter and a half to get back in to the game since I had several scary images hovering around me. The whole incident reminds me of something George Costanza from Seinfeld would have said. "The worlds are colliding! They are killing independent Scooter!"

Mailbag

Good call on the Holly Rowe stuff. I think she is a hottie too. However, go easy on Danielson, he’s not that bad.

Jerrod Stoller – Purdue Grad
Atlanta, Georgia

Hey, she’s mine, Stoller, so don’t you go bird-dogging my girl. As far as Danielson goes, I would give you ten bucks if you would get Purdue Pete to bash that guy in the mouth with his sledgehammer so we could all go back to watching the S.E.C. games in peace.

My Dear Nephew:

Have you gone to the dark side?! Are you going to watch the Memphis game or does Sweetie have you doing laundry, cleaning the gutters and getting shelf paper for the cabinets on Saturday? Or maybe you're driving up to the pumpkin patches in North Georgia to go pick out the perfect pumpkin for Halloween? Yeech! Do us all a favor and come back to the land of orange and white or I will send Klondike Earl down there to set you straight.

Aunt Molly

Anyone got the number of that witness relocation program? I might need that…

I had a lot of correct answers to the Vol trivia question this week, and the winner was Ronald Garvin of Kingsport, Tennessee. I wonder if he is the same Ronald Garvin who was known as the “One Man Gang,” in World Championship Wrestling? Anyway, I wanted to say thanks to those who responded, especially: Daniel E. Waters, Joe Lombard, Craig Wiley and Robin Smith of Decherd. TN. They also were correct and I wanted to let them know to keep writing with questions and comments, they are appreciated! The answer was 1, which was confirmed by the Blue Tick Kitty. Her comments are below.

Coach Scooter:

Let's see.....I seem to recall a fairly blustery day in November of 1996 that we lost to Memphis for the only time ever. Did I have too much alcohol in my cat nip? Did we not wear all orange that day as well? Or was I looking through orange colored glasses? Some good memories, Coach, with the mentions of the top five games of the Fulmer era. Keep up the great work on that, we Vol fans appreciate it!

Blue Tick Kitty
Knoxville, Tennessee

Well, BTK, it was a bad day in the Big Orange Nation as we lost to the Tigers, 21-17. We were not in the all orange that day. We were at Memphis, and we were in all white, the Tigers in all blue, and afterward, I was all liquored up! In 1999, we wore the all orange at home against Memphis, and it took a 53 yard pass from Tee Martin to Bobby Graham to set up the winning touchdown in fourth quarter as the Vols barely escaped 17-16. Thanks for your comments about the best games of the Fulmer era, it was fun to write!

If anybody has any memories of your favorite Tennessee games, send them to me and I will put them in my column!

All right, Vol fans, let’s get ready to get behind the Vols and see that they improve from last week since another moment of truth will be coming a week from Saturday on October 7th in Athens. Keep those questions and comments coming! volsdiary@yahoo.com. As I have mentioned before, keep the faith, rub those orange and white rosaries, repeat your game maxims, and never take Coach Fulmer’s name in vain. Go Vols!!

Welcome to Coach Scooter’s College Football Diary for Week 4!

Sunday 10:00am

Well, this is going to be a tough week as far as what I thought of the Vols game. I don’t get pay-per-view, and Sweetie planned a dinner party tonight which has a 6:00pm start time. Hmm, as Cole Trickle said in Days of Thunder, “Ut oh, this is going to hurt…” Of course, when Aunt Molly called in to see how I was feeling before the game, I never answered the phone. I spent most of last night and this morning coming up with a lie so when she finally tracks me down, I will have a believable story. The last thing I needed was a 30 minute profanity laced lecture about ditching the Vols when they really needed our support.

I was glad to hear the Vols took care of business, and if we can have another great week of preparation and solid performance this Saturday against Memphis, I will be encouraged going into the Georgia game, especially since they struggled to beat Colorado.

Since I missed seeing the Vols on Saturday, I decided to do something different this week. Instead of writing about the Marshall game, which I didn’t get to see, I decided to dip into the history vault and write about the top five Tennessee games I have seen during the Fulmer era. I think this will bring back some beautiful memories for all of us.

And now, the great Vol victories of the Fulmer era:

5. Tennessee 20 –Florida 17 OT – Neyland Stadium - September 19, 1998

Sparked by an opportunistic defense featuring Al Wilson, Raynoch Thompson and Deion Grant making the big plays and causing turnovers, the game ended tied at 17. Tee Martin saved the Vols in the first OT by scrambling on 3rd down to give the Vols a chance at a FG. Jeff Hall nailed the kick to give UT a three point lead. Cooper Carslie was called on to tie the game, but his FG spun off to the left and the Vols had finally beaten the Gators. I remember watching the game with Coach B and he said, “Damn, he got it,” but I thought it had hooked just wide and when I heard John Ward say, “No sir,” I knew we had finally done it. I don’t think Coach B’s wife ever heard such a racket as we made that night.

4. Tennessee 23 – Florida State 16 – Fiesta Bowl – January 4, 1999

Surprised this wasn’t #1 on my list? Well, as John Ward said, “It is a once in a lifetime moment,” and it was, but as you will read later, this game is not the best game I have ever seen. However, it remains very dear to my heart. In a sloppy game, the Vols took control early and held off the Noles, thanks to Tee Martin’s passing, Peerless Price’s receiving and a defense that would not let the Vols lose. I spent most of the game curled up in the fetal position in Aunt Molly’s back bedroom since I was so nervous I couldn’t sit with everyone else. Even Coach Cord, a UGA friend who can be a Vol sympathizer at times, went with me and would check on me from time to time. Since Coach B just welcomed a new player on to his team, he had to stay with the wife and we had to talk by phone. We talked the whole game by the way, so in addition to sore legs from pacing back and forth, I had a cauliflower ear, just like Dick the Bruiser. When Keith Jackson said, “Phillip Fulmer has been validated, he is now among the legends that have spent their time at the foot of the Smokey’s,” I got teary eyed and finally relaxed, knowing I can die in peace as I have seen the Vols have an undefeated season and win the national championship.

3. Tennessee 19 – Georgia 14 – Sanford Stadium – October 9, 2004

When the Vols came to Athens, they faced a Bulldog team that was ranked #3 in the nation and could be #1 by the end of the day if things went right. Coach B and I went with Coach Cord, and we were not thrilled by our prospects for victory since we had just been throttled by Auburn the week before and UGA crushed defending national champion L.S.U. the same day. However, much to our surprise, Erik Ainge took the Vols down the field for a TD on their first drive and the defense shut down the powerful UGA offense. The Vols led all afternoon and should have had more points, but James Whilhoit missed three field goals which kept Georgia in it. The game came down to one final drive as David Green took UGA down the field and had to have a TD to win. Coach B and I were so nervous, we couldn’t even talk. Coach Cord would ask us a question and both of us would mumble gibberish as the final seconds ticked down. Finally, with :01 to play, Jason Mitchell knocked down Greene’s final pass and the Vols scored one of the largest upsets of the Fulmer era, 19-14. The win propelled the Vols to the S.E.C. East championship.

3. Tennessee 20 – Alabama 13 – Neyland Stadium – October 26, 1996

In an old fashioned S.E.C. defensive slugfest played in a steady rain all afternoon, the Tide blasted Peyton Manning for most of the game as they sacked him repeatedly, and forced turnovers that were turned into points. With the Vols trailing 13-0 in the third quarter, Manning hit Joey Kent on a 54 yard quick pass for the TD, but Hall missed the extra point. I sat in the rain, catatonic at what was unfolding in front of my eyes. I know this because Coach B found me in his binoculars and told me later, “Yeah, Scoot, you just sat there with your poncho in your lap, rain dripping off your cap, not moving an inch.” Terry Fair intercepted a Freddy Kitchen’s pass as the Tide was driving for a score, and Jay Graham scored a few plays later to tie it. But the biggie was still to come. With time running out, Jay Graham took a hand off from Manning, cut through a hole on the right side of the line and was gone. I have never heard Neyland Stadium erupt like that before and it gave me goose bumps. However, the Tide drove down the field and had one last chance on fourth down deep in Vol territory, but Leonard Little knocked away a Freddie Kitchens pass to end the Tide hopes for a tie. My nephew laughed at me on the walk to the tailgate site since I cried tears of joy the whole way back.


2. Tennessee 28 – Arkansas 24 – Neyland Stadium – November 14, 1998

Everyone remembers where they were when Elvis died, or the Space Shuttle explosions, or any other catastrophic event in the world. I’ll bet you could ask any Vol fan where they were when the Vols came back to beat Arkansas in 1998, and they could paint a picture Michelangelo would be proud of. I was at the Tennessee watching party in a bar in Marietta and ended up walking outside the bar watching the game through the window since I was so nervous. To give you the quick recap, the Vols were ranked #1 the week before, but crapped out on fourth down as Tee Martin’s pass to Peerless Price was tipped away with less than two minutes to play. The undefeated Arkansas Razorbacks, who led all afternoon, were primed for the upset and a rocket shot up the national rankings. However, with less than two minutes left, Clint Stoener rolled out, got his foot stepped on by a lineman and lost the football when he braced himself before falling to the ground. Billy Ratliff fell on the ball, and the rest is history as Travis Henry ran the ball four consecutive times, finally ending in the end zone. Tell me, have you ever seen a more dramatic football game involving the Vols? The Vols would win the rest of the games and claim the national championship. Thank God for miracles!


1. Tennessee 34 - Florida 32 – Ben Hill Griffin Stadium – December 1, 2001

In a game that was moved back to the first week of December because of the 9/11 attacks, the Vols came to Florida as 16 ½ point underdogs. The Gators were primed for a national championship date with Miami if they could beat the Vols and then L.S.U. the next week. However, the Vols took a 14-0 lead and fought the favored Gators for every inch the rest of the way. Travis Stephens rushed for 226 yards (Much better than we did in this year’s game) and the Vols defense looked much like the 1998 defense as they hit the Gators hard and forced key turnovers. I wasn’t worried through the whole game, and didn’t even pace once. Why? Not because I knew we would win, but I was sure we would lose, so I wasn’t about to get my hopes up. However, all week long, Coach B had a feeling about the game and said all along how the Vols would win. I thought he was nuts, and figured we would blow it sooner or later. However, as the Gators drove for the possible tying TD, I kept telling him, “Let them score and take time off the clock, then we’ll stop them on the two point conversion and win the game.” Sure enough that is what happened as we took a 34-32 lead with about a minute remaining. We all were scared as we knew if they got the onsides kick, they would be in range of a FG to win. However, when the ball was recovered (by Jason Witten I think) the game was ours. Afterwards, Aunt Molly, Uncle J.L. Coach Cord and even Rik Chiddix called to say congratulations. Of course, I had to give the phone to Coach B since I cried. I am reminded of the line from Varsity Blues, “Well, Billy Bob cried because he’s a bit of a crier.” Coach B says the same thing about me…

Email me your best and worst Vol games and I will post them in the mailbag section next week!

Mailbag

Hey "Coach"

You're dead on about one thing anyway. Ron Franklin IS the best college football play-by-play guy in the business. And he and Mike Gottfried were the best team for several seasons until ESPN inexplicably broke them up. I think you should use your position as a member of the media to express our opinion on that subject to the decision-makers at ESPN.

Warren
U.T. ' 63

Amen Brother! I agree Ron Franklin is the best college football announcer in the business, and am upset ESPN decided to move him to games that are not in the national spotlight. Could you imagine him doing the Vols-Florida game? The Auburn-L.S.U. game? With the exception of John Ward, Ron Franklin is one of the few announcers I would actually get excited about listening to him call a game. Also, many of you don’t know this, but it was Ron Franklin who narrated the 100 Years of Volunteers video. Let's all voice our opinion to ESPN and get them to right a terrible wrong!

P.S. - Um, “Warren,” I was dead on about more than just one thing last week. Please try to keep up next time, ok? ;)

Coach Scooter
College Football Diary ‘06


Is there anyway to find out about new players on the Vols scout team, their progress and what the coaches think of them?

Great question since there have been a few gems that have started on the scout team. Jeff Powell, one of the heroes of the 1986 Sugar Bowl victory over Miami, comes to mind. I will look into this and see what we can come up with for you. If anyone else has any thoughts on this, email me so I can post the information.


My opinion about the Florida game is the coaching blowed it! Why didn't we go for a field goal instead of trying for another TD? I also can't believe that during the California opening game the coaching staff didn't keep the first string players in for the entire time. While I am all for letting other player’s time on the field...this was the first game and sets the "mood" for the entire season. That game could have been a shut-out and I believe a seasonal motivator for the Vols coming out of a horrible season.

Come on coaches...don't make me come over there and call the plays myself!

Deb

Thanks for the email, Deb. I am glad you took time to voice your opinion, but I truly believe the coaches know what they are doing the majority of the time and we have to trust their judgment. I think in the SEC you have to get as many players into a game as possible since you need as many players as you can to get game experience. The other schools in the conference have depth, so we have to do the same if we expect to compete. The only way the other players are going to get better is to play in the games, especially if they have to fill in for a Justin Harrell and Inky Johnson.

I love you passion and fire, and hope you keep writing in to my column! We’ll get the Vols fixed one way or the other, and if we don’t, I’ll tell Coach Fulmer to get an extra head set ready for you!


I would just like to say that we all think sometimes that a loss to the stinking gators is a lost season sometimes but this has happened before and we still played in ATL on DEC 4 this is the SEC and it's not over till it is over. Unfortunately, I was transferred due to my job, and I have ended up in the middle of "BUCKEYE NATION" and believe me I really need a miracle out of UT this year, last yr was a very long year for me. Already this season I see improvement and GOD BLESS David Cutcliffe. GOOD LUCK AND GO VOLS! GO!

David and Mel Smith

Thanks for the message! I talked to Coach Fulmer today and he thinks we might be able to dispatch the Big Orange Nation Paratroopers to drop behind enemy lines for a rescue operation so we can bring you back to Knoxville for some games. In fact, Coach told me, “No Vol left behind,” and that includes you! Seriously, I know what you mean since I am surrounded by Georgia fans here in Atlanta, and when we lose to them, life becomes tough. I know the Bucks are #1 right now, but it is where you end up, not where you start, so maybe the Vols will be able to make you proud once again by having a great season. Keep the faith!

$%@#% the Gators, the swamp still reeks of Spurrier!
Ghurn Blankston

Thanks Ghurn, I think…

Coach Scoot: Yet another entertaining article about a day in the life of UT football. I think I used up one of my nine lives on Saturday night. I agree with you about Danielson. If I meowed "shut up" once, I meowed it 25 times. He was on my last nerve. Oh, and the checkerboard end zone came on board in 1968. We beat Bama 10-9 that season, I do believe. Can't wait to see what you have for us on Friday.

Go Vols!
Blue Tick Kitty

Thanks, Kitty! You were close on the Checkerboard end zone question. We installed artificial turf in 1968 before the Georgia season opener, which was a 17-17 tie, but the first year the checkerboard end zones were seen was 1964. I agree that Danielson needs to be smacked, so you get my vote to do that smacking. Did you hear him last week say Mitch Mustain was having a great game and seemed in total control? The QB was 7-22 and threw consecutive interceptions that almost cost the Hogs the game. To quote Gordon Gekko, “This turkey is totally brain dead!” Hey, maybe we can do a live Coach Scooter’s College Football Diary broadcast at Neyland Stadium before a game and sell tickets? “See the Blue Tick Kitty smack Gary Danielson, $1 each!” What do you think?


Since we did not have a trivia winner this week, the next week's trivia question prize will be a lifetime supply of Smokey Mtn. Market Hot Dogs! The hot dogs go to the first person who emails me the correct answer to this question:

How many times has Tennessee lost to Memphis?

A) 0
B) 1
C) 2
D) Never

Email your questions and comments to: volsdiary@yahoo.com

Until Friday, Vol fans, keep the faith, repeat your game maxims, rub those roasry beads and NEVER take Coach Fulmer's name in vain! Go Vols!